Jumbo Jokes and Riddles Book Read online

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Alpaca.

  Alpaca who?

  Alpaca the suitcase before we go!

  Words to Know

  skit:

  A short and funny play. A class might write a skit for a school performance. Sometimes a show will be made up of a few different skits.

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Lana.

  Lana who?

  Lana the free, home of the brave!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Nanny.

  Nanny who?

  Nanny one home?

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Sweden.

  Sweden who?

  Sweden sour chicken!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Waddle.

  Waddle who?

  Waddle you give me for my birthday?

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Hammond.

  Hammond who?

  Hammond eggs make a good breakfast!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Canoe.

  Canoe who?

  Canoe tell

  me a story?

  Fun fact

  Arachno-What?

  Arachnophobia is the fear of spiders, but most of these creatures are nothing to be afraid of! Spiders are actually good to have around. Almost all of them are completely harmless, and they catch and eat pesky insects.

  We Deliver!

  It’s fun to order takeout food and have it delivered. But it’s even more fun if the delivery person has a yummy name! Choose from the middle initials and last names scattered down the right side of this page. Write them on the correct lines to create seven deliciously different delivery people who might come knock-knocking at your door to bring dinner!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Lionel.

  Lionel who?

  Lionel get you nowhere!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Dishes.

  Dishes who?

  Dishes the police,

  open the door!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Rich.

  Rich who?

  Rich man is a poor man with money!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Spider.

  Spider who?

  I spider hiding in the yard!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Orson.

  Orson who?

  ’Orson carriage!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Aspen.

  Aspen who?

  A-spen around until I get dizzy!

  What am I?

  I’m fast as can be, and built for speed. I’ve got huge claws, and my nest is grand. I live in high cliffs, in canyon walls, and even on city skyscrapers. What am I?

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Holly.

  Holly who?

  Holly days are fun!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Pest.

  Pest who?

  Pest wishes to you!

  What’s So Funny

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Ivan.

  Ivan who?

  Ivan extra few

  minutes

  for some more jokes!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  April.

  April who?

  April showers bring May flowers!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Bach.

  Bach who?

  Bach to the future!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Heart.

  Heart who?

  Heart it through the grapevine!

  Try This

  Make a Rainbow

  On a sunny day, get the garden hose and then stand with your back to the sun. Adjust the hose nozzle so it just lightly mists water. Hold the hose up in front of you, and then look closely. You will see a rainbow in the mist.

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Telly.

  Telly who?

  Telly your brother to come home!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Raisin.

  Raisin who?

  Raisin our hands before we speak!

  Funny Friends

  We’ve hidden the first half of fifteen knock-knock names in the grid. Look carefully as you highlight each name, and you’ll find each person’s last name, too. One is done for you!

  HINT: Middle initials are sometimes included.

  EXTRA FUN: Turn each name into a knock-knock joke!

  Words to Know

  parody:

  A play, sometimes a musical, that is meant to be very funny and often makes fun of something.

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Hacienda.

  Hacienda who?

  Hacienda the story!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Whoville.

  Whoville who?

  Whoville answer the door ven I knock?

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Summer.

  Summer who?

  Summer time and the living is good!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Dale.

  Dale who?

  Dale come if you invite them!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Quiche.

  Quiche who?

  Quiche me, I love you!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Root.

  Root who?

  Root for me at the game!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Hiram.

  Hiram who?

  Hiram your best friend, don’t you

  remember me?

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Phyllis.

  Phyllis who?

  Phyllis in on the details!

  Words to Know

  guffaw:

  A loud burst of uncontrollable laughter. If you’re watching a movie that has many funny things happening, you might not be able to control your laughter. That’s when you are likely to guffaw!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Meter.

  Meter who?

  Meter in the lobby!

  Try This

  Learn to See Around Corners!

  Find a ruler, some tape, and a small mirror. Carefully tape the mirror to the ruler, making sure not to cover up the mirror with the tape. Stand to one side of a door and hold the ruler outside the doorway, so that the mirror is at the farther end. If you move the mirror around, you will be able to see different things in the room through the mirror!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Carrie.

  Carrie who?

  Carrie me home, I’m tired!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Rhoda.

  Rhoda who?

  Rhoda donkey at the zoo!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Rozette.

  Rozette who?

  Rozette a bug, now she feels sick!

  Chapter 8

  Knock-Knock Yourself Silly

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Olive.

  Olive who?

  Olive you too!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Cher.

  Cher who?

  Cher would be nice to see you again!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Lima bean.


  Lima bean who?

  Lima bean working on the railroad!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Hive.

  Hive who?

  Hive got my eye on you!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Dee.

  Dee who?

  Dee-licious!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Stuart.

  Stuart who?

  Stuart up and serve it while it’s hot!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Lisbon.

  Lisbon who?

  Lisbon to the movies twice this week!

  Fun fact

  Penguin Pairs

  Male and female penguins have a very interesting way of courting each other. If a male penguin is interested in a female penguin, he may offer her small pebbles as a gift. If she accepts, he knows he has won her heart.

  What am I?

  I can be found in marshes, swamps, lakes, and ponds. I am famous in the South. I can grow up to 13 feet long, and as an adult I may weigh up to 500 pounds. I catch my food by clamping my jaws shut over them.

  What am I?

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Anita.

  Anita who?

  Anita good rest!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Tonto.

  Tonto who?

  Tonto get ready for school!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Isaac.

  Isaac who?

  Isaac-ly who you think it is!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Chair.

  Chair who?

  Chair your secrets with me!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Vine.

  Vine who?

  Vine-derful news!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Cedar.

  Cedar who?

  Cedar plane flying in the air!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Roxanne.

  Roxanne who?

  Roxanne sand are at the beach!

  Ho, Ho, Ho

  The answer to this joke is missing the letters a, e, i, o, and u. Can you fit them in the proper blanks?

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Grant.

  Grant who?

  Grant me a wish!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Babbit.

  Babbit who?

  Babbit in the garden

  ate our lettuce!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Luke.

  Luke who?

  Luke through the

  peephole and you’ll see!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Sole.

  Sole who?

  ’Sole new day!

  Try This

  Yesterday and Today

  Collect some old photos of grandparents or other older relatives. Now get some pictures of you and your friends. Put the new photos next to the old photos to see how different things are today. What kind of clothes did the people in the old photos wear? Are there other differences you can detect?

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Iguana.

  Iguana who?

  Iguana tell you something!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Diploma.

  Diploma who?

  Diploma is coming to fix the pipes!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Chelsea.

  Chelsea who?

  Chel-sea you later!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Fruit.

  Fruit who?

  Fruit of all evil!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Utah.

  Utah who?

  Utah-king to me?

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Sabina.

  Sabina who?

  Sabina long time since I told you a

  knock-knock joke!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Bolivia.

  Bolivia who?

  Bolivia me, I know what I’m talking about!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Watson.

  Watson who?

  Wats-on the radio?

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Latin.

  Latin who?

  Latin me through the door is a

  good idea!

  What ’s So Funny

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Peace.

  Peace who?

  Peace and carrots!

  Words to Know

  vaudeville:

  Know A staged performance including a lot of different types of acts. There could be singing, dancing, comedy, acrobats, and even animal tricks. Everyone loves a good vaudeville show!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Ike.

  Ike who?

  Ike could dance all night!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Chicken.

  Chicken who?

  Chicken’ out the situation!

  Aye, Aye, Captain

  First, figure out what word each letter and picture puzzle represents. Then, number the words in the proper order to create the answer to this joke:

  Knock, knock.

  Who’s there?

  Fire Engine.

  Fire Engine who?

  Fun fact

  Yawning for Air

  Yawning when you’re tired is actually a wake-up call for the brain. Your brain needs lots of oxygen, which is carried in your bloodstream to all parts of your body. When you’re tired, your heart pumps more slowly. This means oxygen gets to your brain slowly. When you yawn, your brain gets the oxygen a lot faster. That makes your brain happy!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  U-8.

  U-8 who?

  U-8 my candy bar!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Harry.

  Harry who?

  Harry-planes fly overhead!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Ken.

  Ken who?

  Ken you tell me something new?

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Eliza.

  Eliza who?

  Eliza when he doesn’t want anyone to

  know the truth!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Banana.

  Banana who?

  Banana split, so ice creamed!

  Knock knock!w

  Who’s there?

  Galway.

  Galway who?

  Galway or else!

  What am I?

  I can eat a thousand flying insects in one night. My favorite place to live is very close to others like me. I can hang out upside down all day long. One of the best things about me is that I fly around at night and I don’t need the light.

  What am I?

  Where in the World?

  Use each of the place names from around the world to complete one of the jokes below. Be careful—there are more names than you need.

  EXTRA FUN: Turn each of the place names into a knock-knock!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Daryl.

  Daryl who?

  Daryl only be one chance!

  Try This

  Make Your Own Rain Catcher

  Tape a ruler to the inside of a coffee can or small jar. Then set the jar outside the next time it rains. After the rain ends, you can measure how many o
f inches of rain have fallen during the rainstorm!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Tom.

  Tom who?

  Tom-ah-toes are yummy!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Barry.

  Barry who?

  Barry sorry for the mix-up!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Guava.

  Guava who?

  Guava good time!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Ada.

  Ada who?

  Ada lot of candy

  and now I have a

  tummy ache!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Minotaur.

  Minotaur who?

  Minotaur ready, we’ll go!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Vera.

  Vera who?

  Vera you going for dinner?

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Czar.

  Czar who?

  Czar-y about spilling the drink!

  Words to Know

  spoof:

  A light and playful way of making fun of something. You might see a television show, a movie, or a play that’s a spoof, or even read a story that spoofs something or someone.

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Randy.

  Randy who?

  Ran-dy track twice!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Illegals.

  Illegals who?

  Ill-egals stay in the nest till they’re old

  enough to fly!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Waddle.

  Waddle who?

  Waddle you give me?

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Fission.

  Fission who?

  Fission for trout!

  What’s So Funny

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Wheelbarrow.

  Wheelbarrow who?

  Wheel-barrow the car

  and go for a ride!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Beehive.

  Beehive who?

  Beehive yourself or you’ll get in trouble!

  Knock knock!

  Who’s there?

  Gwen.

  Gwen who?

  Gwen are we leaving?